I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
of course. lets lasso hookers.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Randomize
