My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
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