SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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