Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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