Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (951): View more from California

  I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (951): I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him. http://tfl.nu/aa9y
  Replies (34) Good night (3512) Bad night (5154)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again. http://tfl.nu/kiui
  Replies (23) Good night (6016) Bad night (1368)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.

  (407): View more from Florida

  Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (321): Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk. (407): Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked. http://tfl.nu/656t
  Replies (21) Good night (5607) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes. http://tfl.nu/hbc7
  Replies (8) Good night (3364) Bad night (1117)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids http://tfl.nu/uov9
  Replies (4) Good night (948) Bad night (2315)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Blood and glitter go together right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): Blood and glitter go together right? http://tfl.nu/jbni
  Replies (9) Good night (1535) Bad night (889)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): he ate me out like he was chugging a beer. http://tfl.nu/i72l
  Replies (13) Good night (820) Bad night (2893)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump. http://tfl.nu/2ksd
  Replies (7) Good night (611) Bad night (2206)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back. http://tfl.nu/xhdz
  Replies (23) Good night (2468) Bad night (843)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow http://tfl.nu/s6a2
  Replies (2) Good night (812) Bad night (504)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt? http://tfl.nu/9qop
  Replies (8) Good night (1736) Bad night (530)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies. http://tfl.nu/0fef
  Replies (8) Good night (1731) Bad night (485)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell http://tfl.nu/i2t1
  Replies (10) Good night (2059) Bad night (945)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me. http://tfl.nu/b8jl
  Replies (12) Good night (1059) Bad night (388)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Dude, where are you?

  (928): View more from Arizona

  In back

  (928): View more from Arizona

  of car

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  ... whose car?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (901): Dude, where are you? (928): In back (928): of car (901): ... whose car? http://tfl.nu/bog4
  Replies (0) Good night (675) Bad night (374)

Randomize