Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
