peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
