White coat. Heels.
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
