and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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