Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I think your dad took our porno
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize