Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
