mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
