he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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