i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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