We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
