Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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