he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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