Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(810): View more from Michigan

Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college

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(416): View more from Ontario

Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.

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(213): View more from California

How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(631): View more from New York

I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?

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(914): View more from New York

Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.

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(712): View more from Iowa

I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.

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(585): View more from New York

You turn 21 at midnight!

(1-585): View more from New York

This is better than being born!!

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(707): View more from California

On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.

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