Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Randomize
