I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"