Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
