i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
