the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Your mouth is God's brothel.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
