maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
