marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
