What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
he thought i was a dude.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
