Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize