my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
