She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
