I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
