What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
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