i need an iv and a liver transplant
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
