If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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