Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
