Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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