Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
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I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
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