bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
