Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
The chlamydia really affected his face.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Randomize
