Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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