i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
