I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
