i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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