Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Randomize
