I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
