the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
