I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
