turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
