You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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