I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
