in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Im part way to drunk.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize