I think my vagina is haunted
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
